scamper
@essdogg I just pooped out a tiny little heart. I would watch Zooey doing her taxes and wearing a lead smock.
| scamper killed the blender during a smoothie production. The spinny part nearly shot across the room. Whee! Mmm, melted plastic. |
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| scamper @elizagauger Delicious selection. The most difficult part will be choosing just which one to haunt my warren... |
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| scamper @matthewlevine I like that. Or: http://tinyurl.com/574drq |
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| scamper @stechert Yeah, that one was the last straw for me. Ignoring the 4th amendment for political gain doesn't fly. |
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| scamper I swear, some days it doesn't even pay to chew through the restraints. |
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| scamper caught the reflection of the ceiling fan in the microwave handle and thought it was a giant spider. Yay, still retarded! |
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| scamper @elizagauger I use good old fashioned intimidation to keep my hair short. At times I'll even resort to castigation, but only when necessary. |
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| scamper @kimmi8 I tried that stunt as well, with similar results. It's like trying to have a workout in a crack house. Essentially. More or less. |
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| scamper @elizagauger Holy pods, dude. your art makes me love, but my envy keeps me at bay. Perfect limbo! Well played. Seriously, awesome work. |
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| scamper On phone, started eating chocolate mix because it was in arm's reach, but then couldn't talk because it dried out my tongue. I am seven. |
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| scamper @wholefoods Less spicy hummus, more regular! It's why there's always so much spicy left over — it scares people. Stock more regular? Haig's! ... |
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| scamper @smartyboots Which Jesse? Everyone's gay these days, didn't you hear? I think it's a mandate or sumfin. Get it? Man date? I'm here all week. |
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| scamper @jenwillis It could be worse: http://www.hotchickswithdou... |
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| scamper @jenwillis Actually I dropped Obama after he dropped the ball no FISA. I don't think he'll miss me, but as long as I have my hummus... |
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| scamper was just "friended" on Twitter by Whole Foods. I guess they liked my feedback email? |
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| scamper just wrote customer feedback to Whole Foods pleading with them to restock the fuckin Haig's Hummus — and not the "spicy" kind! No hummus. :( ... |
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| scamper @caroleen I'm glad I wasn't drinking anything just then (though one of my eyeballs still popped out, so). |
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| scamper @BarackObama Fail on FISA. Bye... |
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| scamper @mayavosko I have a bad hummus addiction. Every day after work: pita and hummus. Day after day. Tubs. Hummus. |
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