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hotdogsladies
Using Twitter as a conversational tool is like using your phone to make paella. It might work, but it's not really suited to that purpose.
about 15 hours ago
from web
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mikeziemer
I love boobies. Just sayin...
09:27 PM July 16, 2008
from txt
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trixie360
LIVE message: "DANG TRIXIE >,< NOT BE A COMPLETE PERV.....BUT U GOT SOME BIG~O~TITTIES^_~" Good thing he's not a perv
12:09 AM July 17, 2008
from web
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thelonelysouls
Rolling Stone Magazine reminds me of the cheap wrapper rest area toilet
paper comes in, except it's in color.
05:33 PM July 01, 2008
from web
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Remiel
When the robots finally DO rise up and say "We're taking over," they'll probably wonder why so many of us burst out laughing.
12:38 PM June 30, 2008
from TweetLater
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hotdogsladies
"By RECEIVING this email you grant Mr. Mann PERMANENT & EXHAUSTIVE control of ALL EXISTENCE. If this reached you in error, too fucking bad."
11:14 AM June 27, 2008
from web
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hotdogsladies
Cision is a company that sells your contact information to PR people without your permission. Feel free to also pass along my middle finger.
08:16 AM June 25, 2008
from web
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AlfredENeuman
Yes, I'm traveling with the Giz Wiz. I came to San Fran 1st class too. Except The Giz was on Continental & I was in crate mailed 1st class!
02:29 AM June 19, 2008
from web
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Remiel
Fuck multitasking, and THEN beat it to death.
06:26 PM June 18, 2008
from web
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digitalkitty
Athletic scholarships... boggling the mind since 1906.
01:07 PM June 18, 2008
from Spaz
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hotdogsladies
Christina Aguilera doesn't really _sing_ songs so much as make them run stairs until they trip, vomit, and cry.
04:57 AM June 18, 2008
from web
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scottsimpson
"Kid, never trust a man named after a fish: you never know where his true allegiances lie." —my Imaginary Personal Trainer
12:50 PM June 17, 2008
from twitterrific
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ncroal
30 customers. 6 MGS 4 bundles. 1 L.A. GameStop on launch day. Solution? Rock, paper, scissors, says store clerk.
07:55 PM June 15, 2008
from TwitterBerry
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lonelysandwich
Due to dearth of Father's Day cards, forced to choose between two sentiments I have no wish to express. Went with "I accept you, Gay Dad."
03:22 PM June 15, 2008
from PocketTweets
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Remiel
My nephews don't care about the Yahoo-Google deal, vodka, Kant or Christina Ricci. Falling back on "you've grown!" "how's school?" and snot.
04:38 PM June 15, 2008
from txt
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scottsimpson
Is there a charity that fixes the cleft palates of poor children, and then implants those clefts into the palates of demonstrable assholes?
12:14 AM June 15, 2008
from web
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Remiel
Her: (via sms) "Happy father's day! wouldn't that be a horrible way to tell someone ur pregnant?" LOL yes it would! Ha ha ha! Ha. Ha ha? Ha?
09:10 PM June 14, 2008
from twhirl
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Remiel
Oops, and there go 2 more followers from the ultra-narrow "Fuck pandas, Falwell, and Wal-Mart but children are sacred!" value cross-section.
09:14 PM June 13, 2008
from web
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Remiel
Gauge how approachable co-workers think you are: count how many times they thank you for a trivial favor. More than 5 times? You're a dick.
05:42 PM June 13, 2008
from web
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Remiel
Joke about pedophilia, cancer and race all you want. But if the pandas are wiped out by the earthquake, steer clear. Those guys are FUZZY.
02:47 PM June 13, 2008
from web
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