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Erika Jurney
ErikaJurney I just told my cat to suck my dick. Pretty sure I need to find a way to relax...
Tofu De la Moore
tofu916 i keep thinkin about nekkid fat chicks...vigorous masterbating to ensue later.
Gwen Bell
gwenbell Here's the thing about life "moments." They are called moments for a reason - I'm missing the mom. All joy has an undercurrent of sadness.
David Markland
davidmarkland Breaking: Principal is suspending student for wearing anti-Obama shirt. http://tinyurl.com/4v6rne Kid will focus on economy from home.
turkey natalie
nagdalie we told our boys about the birds & bees last night. jacob was disturbed by it all-shaking his head & asking why we had to tell him that!
Dan Novy
novysan Do not read Fangoria Magazine while pooping. It leads to an odd sense of vulnerability.
Jeff Robbins
jjeff I've come up with a drinking game based on the show Mad Men. It works like this: You take a drink whenever anyone on the show takes a drink.
JennChantal
jennchantal i'll donate to anyone's marathon cause, if it means i don't have to run one myself
Jack Hussein Holt
jackholt Postman just delivered my new copy of The Odyssey. EPIC MAIL!
hotdogsladies
hotdogsladies Just lost a ton of followers who are big Burning Man fans. I can tell because my laptop smells less like patchouli and art cars.
cockerham
cockerham Did you know that federal officers totally don't have to abide by the rockin'/knockin' rule? The Supreme Court made a ruling back in 1974.

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